Member in Focus
La Trill (Tr'e) Loveridge, 32 years old

I am a survivor of sexual, physical, emotional, and verbal abuse. How did I ever survive? I sung that Diana Ross song... ha, ha, ha!!! No, just kidding: But it did survive because I needed to or I would not be able to share my story. Basically, I was first put into foster care because my mother was and still is a drug addict. And my father...who knows who he really is!

My mother left me all the time with people who I did not know (men and women who did the dirtiest things to me). All my mom would say (when she finally came around) was "oh shut up", and I would say "o.k." I would accept that! I thought it was normal to hit and be mean to people. That was my way of protecting myself, to lash out and fight.

I was a very bad kid. No matter what home I would go to I always got kicked out or I ran away. I had either beat someone up or I was tired of being sexually abused by the father of the home.

My mother was so amazing... so I thought. I learned soon enough because that last time I ended up with her she moved to Utah with her new boyfriend or husband. The wonderful system of Los Angeles social services thought that I needed to be with my mother again. I agreed, thinking everything would work out. But like always it didn't. I ended up running away because he (whoever he was) decided that he would do dirty things to me. I told my mom and what did she tell me "oh shut up" (her famous words).

So I was going to show her... I ran away! I ran away and I ended up in the Utah foster care system. I went to three homes before I ended up in the best home ever. It was a single foster mother taking care of several girls all by herself and she worked a full time job on top of that. She devoted her life to all of us. Now I am not saying I was the perfect child because I wasn't. I came to her home really messed up. I was now about 13 years old with a chip on my shoulder, mad at the world, everyone owed me something so I thought. My foster mom fixed that quick.

One day after my many fits, destroying her house, and beating up a few people, she decided to take me to Youth Services. She packed all my things, put me in the car, and drove me all that way there. When we got there she turned to me and said "You know Tr'e, I love you, I believe in you, and I know deep down inside there is a girl in there who is so sweet and is looking for someone to love her and not hurt her. I am that kind of mother that will do that but you need to make a choice..." So now I am looking at this crazy lady like, "Hello? I just destroyed your house and kicked the crap out of this girl! You are going to give me a chance?" I looked at her and I said, "Ok, what do I have to do?" And she said, "Well, all I ask is that you start believing in yourself and stop feeling sorry for yourself." She also explained to me that if I did not want to end up like my mother or like the other people who did all that awful things to me then I better change and straighten up. Because if I kept going the way I've been going, I would either end up dead, on drugs, or in jail. So instantly a light clicked on and I was like "no way man!" I did not want to end up like my mother, no way!

I remember that day so well... I will never forget that day nor how she (my foster mother) helped me see the better and make better choices. I love her so much. My foster mom (who I refer to as my mom) is the best thing that has happened to me in my life besides my two beautiful children... my son Jordan and my daughter Jazzmine and my true love, my husband. I have been married for 14 years and he is so wonderful. My mom is such a wonderful grandmother to my children and they love her too. She saved my life and I love her so much for that. I hope my story inspires you and I thank the uFOSTERsuccess organization for giving me the opportunity to share it.